This is the latest fashion statement of anybody who is going to get/got recently married. Please tell me the meaning of this?
Marriages can happen only in 2 ways – you fall in love with somebody, tell your parents – who oppose it – convince them in the latter case; and get married. Or, leave that entire mess of finding somebody to your parents/paraphernalia family – browse through a couple of photos – say yes to one – meet the girl/boy and say a yes/no. The first one called a “Love Marriage” and the second one called an “Arranged marriage”.
Now what is this Love-cum-arranged marriage then? Ask an explanation to anybody who says his/her marriage is this type and here comes the reply – Our parents arranged our meeting and we fell love and got married. Hey! Does that mean that there are “No Love-cum-Arranged” marriages also? I thought when you married somebody; you either loved him/her beforehand or got to love you after marriage. Why this special tag, then?Why people feel this process is out of fashion and need some jazzy stuffs .
Why is so wrong to say that – yes my parents found my life partner for me! Anybody who marries the match found by his/her parents ultimately loves the partner right? Well – love does not happen that way – you cannot go out into the market and search for it. If it did not happen, well it did not – and if your parents found a nice partner for you, then why feel so bad that you have to inject this phrase and try to make yourself a hero?
If we take the examples of our parents we will see that almost everybody had an arranged marriage and they fell in love after marriage. And even after twenty five to thirty years of married life they still love each other. So it's not that you can love somebody then only you can marry. You can marry and than start liking and eventually loving that person. It is how you look into the matter. It is not necessary to know a person than only you can love. You can love without even knowing. Love doesn't come forcibly to anybody it just comes naturally. For loving somebody you need to spend time together, you need to understand each other; you need to be loyal to each other. There should be commitment, trust and empathy in your relationship then only true love grows.
After marriage when two unknown person start staying together naturally a kind of bonding develops between them. And when you start spending time together, understand each other's need and being more committed to each other love is bound to happen. Physical attraction or love comes before marriage but true unconditional love only comes only after long relationship. Years after marriage people love each other and this is because they have been committed to each other. Any relationship grows when you give time and effort to it. Love after marriage starts only when you think the way your spouse think. You should be his or her mirror image. So be it love or arranged cum love marriage the core essence in both remains the same that is true unconditional love.
After marriage when two unknown person start staying together naturally a kind of bonding develops between them. And when you start spending time together, understand each other's need and being more committed to each other love is bound to happen. Physical attraction or love comes before marriage but true unconditional love only comes only after long relationship. Years after marriage people love each other and this is because they have been committed to each other. Any relationship grows when you give time and effort to it. Love after marriage starts only when you think the way your spouse think. You should be his or her mirror image. So be it love or arranged cum love marriage the core essence in both remains the same that is true unconditional love.
In my opinion I think marriage may be any be it arranged or love. The most important is caring and understanding each other. Sometimes people take 2 months to know each other sometimes they don't understand each other for 2 years. So I don't think love or arranged makes any difference. The thing is that both partners should be at their best comfort level and be himself or herself. Today many people think that if someone is doing arrange marriage they are compromising their life for their parents. But its not so. And you know the fact we don't think and love. It comes anytime in our lives. We start caring for someone, loving someone without thinking the consequence. So ultimately we are the ones who has to convince our parents. But our parents also arrange the right partner for us because they know us. So I conclude saying compatibility between partners are must in any relation to be succeed.
PS : It's completely my opinion ...I don't want to hurt any one's personal thoughts....Ur comments and criticisms are always welcome....
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